large north starProjection–a defence mechanism

Pick only one item from the following list and spend as much time as you need in determining how you would cope with that situation should arise. This is absolutely necessary, otherwise if a new disturbing situation arises and you haven’t figured out how to cope with it, you would automatically want to _____, and that would do nothing to solve the problem. In fact, it would mean that you had compounded your problems. Try to see yourself faced with this situation. How will you react?

Think out your response to these situations or under each of these circumstances: at a party; being fired from work; in a group of strangers; retirement from work; travelling for long periods of time; in trouble with the law; receiving exciting news; family health problems; family behaviour problems; receiving bad news; pregnancy; divorce; major business re-adjustment; separations; sexual difficulties; surgery; financial problems; illness; starting a new job; injury; in-law troubles; marriage; going on vacation.

Think out your response to changes in: living conditions; personal habits; working hours; residence; recreation; social activities; sleep habits; eating habits.

Each day is like a “little” life in which we shape our own lives. One day at a time, a successful life is lived. One cannot live tomorrow, only prepare for it. Put all your efforts into today and you will be ready to face tomorrow with confidence and courage. Breath easy.
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How do you resist?
“We are all change-resisters as much as change-seekers,” says Dr. Ellen Siegelman. And we resist in at least 12 different ways, adds Laurie J. Bilik, of Bilik Associates, a New York consulting firm dealing with stress management and change. How many of these do you identify with?
· Fear of failure. “If I fail, what will they think of me?”
· Fear of success. “If I succeed, what will they expect of me next?”
· Denial. “I’m fine the way I am…but you could lose a few pounds.”
· Negativism. “I can’t so why try.”
· Habit. “I’ve always been this way.”
· Low self-esteem. “I’ll never be worth much, no matter what I change.”
· Fear of the unknown. “Who knows what may happen!”
· Inconvenience. “I’d have to change my whole schedule.”
· Uncertainty over the reward. “Will it be worth it?”
· Fear of looking silly. “Can you imagine what I’d look like?”
· Threat to security. “Will they still like me if I do better than they do?”
· Real or imagined opposition from others. “My husband would never say so, but I know he doesn’t want me to do it.”
Overcome resistance by changing something you know you can change.________________

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